Love & Relationships

How to Beat Jealousy

02.18.13 How to Beat Jealousy: Cotton Candy Magazine

We’ve all been jealous.  And we have all had jealousy directed towards us.  Feelings of jealousy can stem from those around you but oftentimes can be related to people we do not know or have never met.  Think about it. Have you ever been envious of your favorite reality star?

In order to rid ourselves of jealousy and to learn how to deal with the jealousy of others, we should get to the root cause.  Unmet expectations, a sense of entitlement, an illusion of perfection and insecurity are all common causes of jealousy.  Jealousy can happen when one person feels she should have what belongs to another, perhaps a person, a possession, status or even education.

Cotton Candy wants to help you and others in dealing with jealousy.  Our love editors give you five ways to deal with jealousy in your life.  Applying each of these steps will help you identify the root cause and move away from those feelings.

No. 1 Don’t Compare Yourself to Others

Sounds so simple, right?  But we often fall into the trap of comparing ourselves.  The editors of Cotton Candy tackle the game of comparison in our eBook, The Sugar List: 101 Ways to Explore the Sweet Side of Life. We want you to know that you are a unique person who cannot be duplicated.  So comparing yourself to someone else is fruitless.  Your distinctive qualities benefit the environment and people around you and even have far-reaching positive effects that continue to reverberate.  It’s important to realize this so that you can harness and then leverage your abilities.  Expending energy and focus on someone else’s talents will take time away from your skills and goals.  So, it’s imperative not to compare yourself to others.  Be inspired by others, but don’t ever compare.

No. 2 Focus on Helping Others

It’s incredible.  One of the best ways to build your own self-esteem is by helping others.  Make a positive impact on the life somebody else.  You will build confidence and gain satisfaction that only come with helping people who cannot help themselves.  Helping others will change your priorities, shift your focus and give you proper perspective.  Eventually, you will begin to see the person or things that are inciting your jealously are only a small part of bigger ideals and goals.  You make a difference and by helping others you will learn your value.

No. 3 Make a List of Your Good Qualities

A major reason you may be feeling jealous is that you don’t recognize all of the desirable qualities that you have.  List your best qualities.  Get your family and friends to help you make the list.  They will probably think of some wonderful traits that you’ve never considered.  Write down the attributes that make you valuable.  You’ll probably be surprised at how much of an impact you are making on your environment.

No. 4 Surround Yourself with Positive People

Positive communication is an integral part of having healthy self-esteem.  Make sure that the people in your life are uplifting and constructive when they are talking to you and through their actions.  A positive circle will bolster your optimistic outlook on life and weed out feelings of jealousy.

No. 5 Attack Your Feelings of Jealousy

We’ve spelled out some important steps to help you overcome jealous feelings.  But more than anything, breaking free from jealousy starts with your thoughts. When you change the way you think, you will change the way you feel and act.  Take your feelings head on and make the decision to be satisfied about where you are in your life, and be happy for others.

Cotton Candy Magazine®