Defeating Doubts | Cotton Candy Magazine®

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Defeating Doubts

05.14.14 Defeating Doubt: Cotton Candy Magazine

It doesn’t matter who you are. Indiscriminate self doubt can creep into our thoughts and insidiously attack our emotions. Self doubt says what you can’t do, where you’ll never be, and what you don’t have.

But those negative emotions have no place in the confident woman’s life. Regardless of how true those thoughts may seem or how real inadequacy feels, you can fight back  with the truth — as long as you know what the truth is. Know your immeasurable worth, and be aware that when self doubt rises up, you can knock it back down. Here are five simple steps to tackle doubt and live in victory.

Be honest with yourself, and admit why you are feeling self doubt.
Like any problem, in order to figure out the solution, you have to first know what is causing the problem. Self doubt appears for many reasons. Insecurity. Envy. Jealously. Rejection. Loss. Even deprecating actions and conversations from others toward you. This is your opportunity to tell yourself the truth, and discover what is causing you to feel the way you do. Once you know where the seed of doubt is stemming from, you can begin to take action in order to eradicate those negative emotions.

Surround yourself with encouraging people in encouraging places.
When we are not around positive people or don’t frequent positive places, sometimes our negative thoughts can feel as if they are worthy enough to believe.  To stay positive, you have to watch who you let into your inner circle. Your close network of relationships should be one of the most protected parts of your life.

Also, self doubt can exacerbate when you are in the wrong place at the wrong time. Make an effort to be in environments that foster positive behavior and healthy thoughts, whether that’s outdoors, at church, or encouraging lectures from positive, societal leaders like those offered at Manhattan arts and cultural center 92nd Street Y.

Tell someone who you trust how you feel.
Remember, you don’t have to deal with self doubt on your own. It’s OK to solicit help from someone else, whether friends or family. A friend, counselor, therapist, or confidant can offer you insight that you may not be willing to believe or accept when you are by yourself. In fact, studies focus on the indisputable healthy power of positive friends and family have. Those who care about you can help you put your emotions in perspective and help you see the great talents, characteristics and abilities that you possess. Talk with a friend, and share with a trusted family member to decrease stress factors and release the negative feelings you have inside.

Think of others.
You can gain confidence when you recite and share good-natured comments with others who may need your help. Not only will you be saying truthful, affable words that uplift someone else, but it will uplift you at the same time. Helping others also requires you to take your focus off of self pity and self doubt, and instead center your thought process on something else. Your psyche adjusts from self-centered feelings, and instead, targets how can you  help someone else who needs you.

Make a habit of thinking and speaking positively about yourself.
Don’t be afraid to say the opposite of how you feel. You’ve got to trust in yourself, and that may take some incessant training and positive self talk. Self doubt and lack of confidence does nothing but make you stagnant when it comes to doing what you are capable of and meant to do. You have something to contribute that others can benefit from and need. And speaking and thinking the truth will remind you of all you can do that makes an impact. Get bold. Take your emotions back. Say out loud to yourself, “I’m worthy, and I have something wonderful to offer.” Use your mind and your mouth to counteract the negative and burgeon the positive.

Defeating Doubt

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